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In the interest a full disclosure, I was a sorority girl back in the day.  Actually, I am bi-sororal (if that ain't a word, I'm declaring it one).  I quit one before I could be kicked out, and was subsequently adopted by another.

I was one of six in Delta Omicron Pi.  One of eight in Pi Sigma Kappa.  Obviously, we were not nationals.  We were smack dab in the Middle of Nowhere, VA, nine miles from the nearest town.

This was a very, very different place than is UNC.

Today.  Was.  Hell.

Apparently, it was some sort of visit all the sorority houses thing day...thing.  Hoardes of young women--looking terrifyingly identical--roaming Franklin St. in packs.

And they all apparently decided they could use our bathroom.  Without buying anything.  When we clearly have a sign that states bathrooms are only for customers.  (Okay, and if I'm working, for street folk.  Management kinda looks the other way for that)

So we're getting packs of ten, fifteen or more at a time, trooping in, using the bathroom, and leaving.  A few had the audacity to ask for a free water cup.

I'm annoyed.  EVERYONE'S annoyed (we're at 68.72% labor, but have had to clean the bathroom five times).  I finally see a group coming, head them off, and chirp "So, are y'all dining in today?"

"No, we're just here to use the bathroom."

"I guess you missed the sign, but our bathrooms are for customers only."

*snap, pop*  [WHAT IS IT WITH THE FUCKING GUM THIS YEAR!?!?!?] *shrug*  "They said we could come here."

"I'm sorry.  I wasn't informed of such a thing.  Which manager did you talk to?"

*sneer*  "THEY said we could."

"Unless someone purchases something, y'all are going to have to leave.  NOW."

She called me a name that I will not repeat.  I hope her folks never find out that that mouth they obviously invested so much money in uses that kind of language.

"Technically, miss, you are trespassing.  I can call the cops now, if you like.  Oh, and I am sure that [regular who is a bigwig at UNC and member of the sorority she was representing] would LOVE to hear how you are representing yourself and your sisterhood."

I get called the name again.

I call to the back "Hey, Manager Tightpants!  Can you get [redacted]'s number for me?  There are some ladies here that I think she'd like to have a little chat with."

Foom.  Scattered them like peroxided, entitled cockroaches.

Chels hugged my shoulders.  "You're my hero."  (She's a senior at UNC, and the girls who come in are flat out mean to her.  But she's working her way through school and, yes, I'm living in a John Hughes film.  Only now I'm Iona instead of Andie)

I popped in back to ask Manager Tightpants if I'd overstepped my bounds.

And there he is, with the other two BoH guys, watching football on someone's laptop.

"Huh?  Oh, yeah.  .just keep doing what you're doing.:

"I think I might have been a little rude."

"Yeah.  That's okay.  They aren't buying anything, so they don't get customer satisfaction surveys.  I don't care."

USS Clusterfuck, y'all.  I think I was actually de facto captain today.

By the end of the day, I DID have to stand at the register for two solid hours because we had the line that would not end.  However, I was handed a number of cash tips (ALL MINE!).  And apparently the old guys are really digging my "Laura Ingalls Wilder" braids and want to give me money.

(I had a serious episode of depression when I was unemployed.  That, combined with perimenopause, meant my hair got SERIOUSLY thin.  I'm just now able to do anything other than put it in a ponytail and hope for the best)

After I finally got to pull my drawer, I grabbed my stuff and bolted to the bodega.  I have cash!  And they sell this kind of glorified Boone's Farm that is trying to pass itself off as "moonshine."

The peach stuff is actually not bad.  Or I might just need to ease the pain that badly.  Whatever.

Fransisco eyes the jar.  "I figured today would be bad.  But come to the back.  I have something for you."

He's not wearing a clown costume and it's not SC, so I figure I'm mostly safe.  I mean, that stuff only happens on Law & Order, right?

He got a sampler of the new Samuel Adams limited edition beers.  "You're not driving, right?"

The Sam Adams Rebel Grapefruit IPA  is a lovely thing..  Even better when given to you in a syrofoam cup "to sip on the walk home."

So I check out the Little Free Library, drop off a couple of books, grab another Roald Dahl for Kent (he didn't read them as a kid.  I find that sad), and head down the hill.

*beep.  Beep, beep, BEEP!*

I just do the one finger salute and keep walking.

The car pulls up next to me and slows.  "Gee, and here I thought you'd like a ride."

One of the Tarheel Takeout guys.  I hestitate.  "I REALLY appreciate it.  But there's beer in this cup. I really can't."

"So don't wave at any cops.  Get in."

Day.  Totally.  Redeemed.

And I came home to find that the candy dicks (I thought they were gummie ones, but whatever) I'm sending with Kent to his Fantasy Football thingie had arrived.

I'd say today was 50/50 for winning.


( 28 comments — Leave a comment )
Sep. 4th, 2016 01:29 am (UTC)
Those sorority girls sound awful , but I would have reacted the same way if it were me. Glad your day got better at the end.
Sep. 4th, 2016 02:59 pm (UTC)
I'm still grinning over the Tarheel Takeout guy. They've become some sort of weird personal taxi service for me. If I'm walking and one goes past, they turn around and pick me up.

I guess this is the reward for free 32oz ice waters with lemon during a hot NC summer. :)
Sep. 4th, 2016 02:24 am (UTC)

Dude what a great post! What a great day. Way to stick it up to those priviledged witches. I wouldve right out applauded you if I was there......you are that awesome.

Edited at 2016-09-04 02:25 am (UTC)
Sep. 5th, 2016 09:53 pm (UTC)
Thank you!
Sep. 4th, 2016 02:53 am (UTC)
grab another Roald Dahl for Kent (he didn't read them as a kid. I find that sad)

Oh, Roald Dahl. I read those (over and over again) when I was a kid. I should pull them for my youngest two.

College towns are...interesting places to live, aren't they? We had a home game today (so in addition to the 60,000 undergrads who seem to think that the roads in College Station are like the roads in Houston/Austin/Dallas/San Antonio (pro tip: they're NOT), we had an extra 50,000+ football fans--who also seem to think that the roads in College Station are like the roads in Houston/Austin/Dallas/San Antonio. I went to the store early in the morning and then holed up in my house all day so I didn't have to drive during the worst of it.
Sep. 5th, 2016 09:54 pm (UTC)
Oh, ugh. Our first game is the 16th, and I am NOT looking forward to it.
Sep. 4th, 2016 03:17 am (UTC)
Those sorority girls sound like a NIGHTMARE. But you, as always, are a badass!
Sep. 4th, 2016 03:01 pm (UTC)
Thank you!
Sep. 4th, 2016 04:50 am (UTC)
Here, we often do it this way in restaurants:
bathrooms are free for customers, and cost 50 cents for people just dropping in for this purpose.
Some sneaky restaurants even charge customers for bathroom visits.
And if it is you (pl, staff) doing the bathroom cleaning, you may even keep the bathroom money as cash tip. :-)
Sep. 4th, 2016 03:02 pm (UTC)
Oh, wow. I wish we did that here!

Hmmmm...maybe I should mention that at the next staff meeting.
Sep. 4th, 2016 05:53 am (UTC)
I have seen a lot of movies about sorority girls.
They always seem to get spanked. I offer my services. LOL
Sep. 4th, 2016 03:04 pm (UTC)
These weren't worth your effort. Trust me. Rude, entitled, condescending, obviously used to their privileged station.
Sep. 4th, 2016 03:10 pm (UTC)
Are you absolutely sure?
Sep. 4th, 2016 10:44 am (UTC)
It makes me sad I used to be one of those girls and I admit it. However, a boss in my first year after college handed my ass to me. Hard lesson, but hey, it made me work harder and think just because I was ohsocute I could get anything I wanted... I did think like that. Gawd, I would kick my own ass if I met me...
Sep. 4th, 2016 03:30 pm (UTC)
Never believe what 'THEY' tell you!
Sep. 4th, 2016 08:49 pm (UTC)
My least favorite sister-in-law is one of those Sorority girls, or was I guess, she graduated in May. I want to throttle her on a regular basis.

We had the displeasure of spending some time with her last night at my in-law's house. She's recently married (3 months now) and is treating her husband like a floor mat. The husband asked my mother-in-law if she needed help making diner, MIL declined so he was going to sit back and watch some football when SIL looked at him and said, "Get up and go help her!" And that pretty much set the tone for the night. Entitled, spoilt, bitchy sorority girls. Screw those bitches. I'm glad you sent your batch running like the slimy cockroaches they are.
Sep. 5th, 2016 03:21 am (UTC)
"Get up and go help her!"

I'm disabled, and I worked retail (translate--on my feet all day) for a decade. It got to the point I specifically *asked* to work on holidays, because I got time and a half pay, and it meant I had to spend less time with my (ahem) family. Many times, I'd show up for a holiday meal, exhausted, in pain, ready to collapse. After the huge meal was over, I was expected to do *all* the cleanup. If my grandmother was hosting, she'd start the cleanup. I'd go in and ask if she needed help. She'd tell me no. I'd collapse on the nearest couch or chair. My mother (her daughter) would berate me for "being selfish."

"But she said she didn't need any help! I'm exhausted!"

"I don't care what she said! You get back in there and help her!"

Of course, father and brother were allowed to watch football in peace, since kitchen cleanup is "women's work."

And they wonder why we aren't close...

Sep. 6th, 2016 03:00 am (UTC)
I'm lucky in this that my husband has an unusually large family, so I can get away with not liking a couple sisters. :)
The shortest way I've found to sum up the family is thus: My husband is the 7th of 8 kids, 4 boys and 4 girls. The boys are full blood brothers and my husband is the youngest, their dad died when my husband was 7 years old. Their mom then married a fellow who has 3 daughters from a previous marriage and the 4th girl was a surprise (to say the least, my mother in law was 43 when she got pregnant) and is half to everyone.
That youngest half sister, B, is 10 years younger than her nearest sibling (my husband) and 20 years younger than the oldest. B was not only spoiled by her parents but also all of the older kids.
I've had some people suggest to me that I'm jealous of her because she had so many things that I never had growing up, which I guess might be part of it, but I don't really think so. B has had everything in her life handed to her and as such has come to believe that everything should be handed to her and that her every whim should be honored.
Interestingly, her behaviors in regards to her husband match those of her next-oldest sister, C, who WAS their dad's youngest child before B came along. (Hope you followed that chain...) B is demanding and the world is to center around her wants and desires. The other sister, C, is my second least favorite. She possibly could have taken that title from B except that I rarely see C so I don't have to deal with her nonsense more than once every year or two.

That went off on a weird tangent there... Short story long: I don't like this sister and one other, but there are 3 brothers and 2 sisters, not to mention my partents-in-law who are great, that I rather enjoy quite a bit so I don't feel guilty in not liking two of them.
Sep. 6th, 2016 03:13 am (UTC)
I have a cordial, polite, relationship with my parents, but I don't love them, and they don't love me (funny how that works when you're disabled...).

By contrast, I get along great with my inlaws. Hubby likes to joke that, if we ever split up, I'd run away to *his* mother, not mine--and he wouldn't be wrong.

Sep. 7th, 2016 02:36 am (UTC)
I have a strained relationship with my mother. She's almost certainly somewhere on the psychopath spectrum, she's not a serial killer but she is narcissistic and cannot see that anything is her fault or why things happen that aren't to her standards or desires.

My husband and I have watched his parents caring for their elderly parents and as such have had conversations along those lines. We are in complete agreement that his mom and my dad are free to live with us for as long as they need to. His step-dad can stay with us after recovering from a surgery; 3 months at the very, very, very most. My mother will be found a nice home where we will talk to her on the phone regularly and visit now and then.
My mom gets a home, and my father who is diagnosed bi-polar, gets to live with us indefinitely, if that shines any additional light on the situation.
Sep. 7th, 2016 02:44 am (UTC)
I dunno if she's ever been officially diagnosed (and she wouldn't tell me if she had), but I've had enough psych courses to know that my mother's somewhere between narcissistic and borderline personality disorder, leaning heavily towards narcissistic.

Every once in a while, my mother likes to tell me that she fully expects me and my husband to take care of her if my father predeceases her. I've looked her in the eye, more than once, and told her she can move to Austin (we're in Houston) to live with my brother if/when that happens. He's always been her "golden child" anyway, I don't owe her a damn thing.

By contrast, my MIL just turned 88, FIL will be 80 in Feb, and both of them are in declining health. Hubby and I are thinking that if we both sold our own houses, we could move together into one house, and the two of us could help my inlaws with everyday things--cooking, running errands, etc.
Sep. 8th, 2016 03:07 pm (UTC)
You know how the saying goes; If it's not one thing, it's your mother.
Sep. 5th, 2016 01:49 am (UTC)
You should definitely definitely definitely keep making Kent read Roald Dahl. So much love.
Sep. 5th, 2016 03:09 pm (UTC)
USS Clusterfuck, y'all. I think I was actually de facto captain today.

I salute you Captain!
Sep. 5th, 2016 08:33 pm (UTC)
You rock!
Sep. 5th, 2016 11:22 pm (UTC)
The sorority girls sound like "Pod/Stepford people" (Hive mind says "Tinkle here NOW!!!")
Sep. 6th, 2016 12:15 am (UTC)
Foom. Scattered them like peroxided, entitled cockroaches.

Best thing I've read all day. YOU GO, GIRL!!!
Sep. 6th, 2016 11:11 pm (UTC)
Thank you for this. :D
( 28 comments — Leave a comment )